let go of the past and forgive yourself
Aren’t those some of the hardest things to do? Let go of pain from the past or to forgive ourselves?
Replaying these situations over and over in our mind is a form of meditation. But not a good form of meditation!
Learning how to let go of the past and find peace using EFT can change your life.
Instead of living in the past, you can live in the present and look forward to the future.
What is it for you? What have you held onto memories that still loom in the back of your mind that you can’t get past?
Years of negative self-talk
I can understand how past events and decisions one makes can feel paralyzing. I can’t count how many times . . . days, weeks, months, even years that I have beat myself up about choices I have made.
You aren’t alone in this.
But there came a time that I realized I was tired of living in the past. The past isn’t where my husband is, the past isn’t where my children are. Only past choices lived there.
With my faith, I knew in my head that I had already been forgiven. So why couldn’t I forgive myself? I wasn’t allowing myself to be human. To grow. To feel blessed that I made it through the hard times and use that to help others.
The past didn’t exist anymore!
I can do that now. Lots of prayer and tapping helped me get there. Working through my thoughts and finally understanding the truth about the situations. Not the lies I kept telling myself.
- You are so stupid.
- You deserved it.
- You aren’t as smart the others.
- . . . . . . and on and on
Stepping back and looking at our thoughts gives us the opportunity to have a place to start the healing. Your healing starts now.
CAUTION: If you have traumatic memories, you need to work more cautiously. If you are working with a counselor, you can ask how you can incorporate this technique into your current care system.
Ready to tap on it?
Focus on one memory that you struggle with. Get that picture in your mind and all your thoughts and feelings about it.
What is the intensity of the memory or thought on a scale of 0-10? Once you have that number, keep picturing that thought, the past memory you are ready to let go of.
“let go of the past & forgive myself” TAPPING SCRIPT
Karate Chop: (Set-up Statement)
- Even though I feel stuck in the past and can’t let go of what happened, I deeply love and accept myself.
- Even though thinking about this memory feels paralyzing, I deeply love and accept myself.
- Even though I wish it never happened, and that what happened long ago never occurred, I love and accept who I am right now.
This horrible memory.
Side of Eye:
I am so ashamed of what happened.
It feels so out of control and I hate this feeling.
I can’t believe it ever happened, it’s unbelievable.
I am so embarrassed it happened and what I did.
Why can’t I get over it?
I am still angry at some of the people involved, including myself.
Top of Head:
Why can’t I let this go?
I wish I could forgive myself, it happened so long ago.
Side of Eye:
Why do I keep punishing myself. I was so clueless at the time.
I feel like I should have known better or made better choices.
I shouldn’t have trusted that person, or dealt with the situation differently.
I get so mad at myself every time I think about it.
I hate feeling stuck in my past and not being able to move forward.
Why do I feel I need to keep beating myself up?
Top of head:
There has got to be an easier way to deal with my past and live in the present.
I am tired of being stuck in this endless loop of thoughts and bad memories.
Side of Eye:
I can see how I am stuck and being so negative.
It makes sense that remaining in the past leaves no time or opportunity for the future.
I want to love my life right now. Appreciate what I have in this moment.
Sometimes that is hard to do.
But remaining in the past is even harder.
I’m ready to forgive myself, the behavior and choices I made, everyone that was involved, and make the decision to move forward.
Top of Head:
I’m letting go of the shame, the guilt, the anger and the expectations of what I think I should have been then . . . . and now. I am going to accept who I am right now and live in the present.
Take a deep breath.
- Check your rating again. Where are you on the 0-10 scale?
- If you aren’t at a 3 or below, do another round.
- You can change up the wording, making even more personal to you.
- Check your rating again.
Maybe you have a number of past memories that you want to work through.
Making a list of memories and situations that you have never forgiven yourself for will help you to get clear on the work you need to do to get to a place of clarity and forgiveness.
Can you imagine a time when thoughts that kept you paralyzed at one time will no longer be given a second thought?
You can do this. Take your time and work through each memory. Documenting this process in a journal can help you to see the proof of your progress and help you to track your new thoughts.
I believe in you,